Things 1-5

As in life,
there comes a time
when every blog
must reevaluate itself.

Recently,
I've been doing just that
with the redesign
and
the one year anniversary
celebratory guest posts
back in January.
Even just last week
we reached the 400th book post,
which I'm sure we can all agree
was an impressive day.

However,
after much consideration,
I've come to the conclusion that
a brown background and
an established history
of scanning a lot of book covers
isn't enough for this blog.
It's time to revamp things a bit.
So this past week I sat down
and made a list.

The first thing that definitely needed to go
was the books.
They're clunky,
there's way too many of them,
scanning can be really annoying,
and honestly,
they're just not that interesting.
Books?
Who reads books anymore?
They're totally passé.
Borders and Barnes & Noble
have been in financial trouble
for what seems like eons now.
And when they close,
who's going to read anymore?
It's not like anyone ever uses the library these days.

With books out of the picture,
it was time to rethink the title of the blog.
Clearly I had to get rid of the
"Parents'"
bit.
I have the coolest parents in the world,
but I'm pretty sure it's not acceptable to admit that.
Or been seen in public with them.
Or admit that I even have parents in the first place.
It's better that you all think
I just suddenly appeared,
walking into town with the sun behind my back
so you couldn't really distinguish my features
and
you can all assume
that one day
—if I can ever afford a car or a horse or a go-cart—
I'll ride back off into that sunset,
never to be seen again.
That's far more appropriate.

With these major changes made,
it became instantly obvious
what this blog needed to become.

And so,
at long last,
I'd like to present:

Stuff On SB's Shelf

My friend,
SB,
has a lot of stuff in his house.
And by a lot, I mean there's stuff everywhere.
There's stuff on the first floor,
there's stuff on the second floor,
there's even stuff in the basement.
A lot of it is pretty interesting.
Some things I don't really know what they are.
SB told me, but I didn't listen.
But, having recently met up with SB for dinner,
he was kind enough to clear a shelf off for me
in his living room
so I could photograph his stuff on it.

Thing 1
This is a shake-weight.
I didn't know anyone had one of these.



SB does, though.
That's pretty interesting.
I don't know if he actually uses it
or if he just keeps it around to use
as a conversation piece at parties.

Thing 2
Clip on opera-glasses magnifying things.


I don't wear glasses,
so these don't apply to me.

Thing 3
Hand-held video game something.


I'm pretty sure this is two things
that don't normally go together.
They're cross-thinging.
That's like cross-breeding,
only with inanimate objects.

Thing 4
I didn't know these sort of things still existed.


I thought natural selection had wiped them out.
I guess not.
I wouldn't be surprised if it was on
the endangered video game list,
though.

Thing 5
I don't know what this thing is.


SB told me what it was about
three or four times
but I still can't remember.
All I know is
it didn't want to sit up straight to be photographed
and
VL,
SB's fiancée,
will be happy to see it in our first set of things.
I like VL,
so that's okay.
I wouldn't want to take this thing home,
though.
It's kind of weird.

That ends our collection of stuff for the day.
I hope you enjoyed
our first post as
Stuff On SB's Shelf.

Before you go,
though,
here's today's clue for
my super awesome secret:

There are things involved.

Oh!

And stuff.